I grew up in a house with Domestic Violence – it is not just physical. In my home it was emotional violence, controlling, and sexual abuse.
From the outside it looked like a loving home with nice vehicles and everything we would need to live a happy life.
My mom worked for him at his small business. He owned the roof over our heads as well as the income that my mom received from her job at his business. He controlled how much money she could spend on groceries/household items and here was a lot of manipulation.
He is also the person who sexually abused me from 8-16. There was physical violence as well, from his children directed at me to hurt my mother – and he did nothing to stop it. I recall locking myself in the bathroom many times to get away from the attacks. As a child I felt that if I told my mom and she left, it would mean she had no income as she would lose her job, and that we would homeless with no place to live so I remained silent even though I knew it was wrong.
I will never forget Boxing Day (Dec. 26), 1997 when I went to my mom’s for our Christmas celebration – she had half the house packed – she finally had enough and was leaving. I have never been so proud of her as I was that day. It would still be a few months before I told her what had happened to me (she honestly had no idea). I went to the police and he was arrested for historic child sexual abuse. My court case ended in a guilty verdict, although no jail time was ever served. Our story has a positive outcome, but so many do not.
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